If you have plans on becoming great, you’ll want to read this brief article.

They say success leaves clues; this implies, “if we look at people who are great, we’d find a common denominator, a golden thread tying them all together.”

Here’s what I think we’d find:

We’d find people who discovered their talent and then showcased that talent to the world in a ”new” and creative way.

Most of the people we’d find wouldn’t be doing anything “new.”  They would be doing something that’s been done before, in a “new” and unique way.

There’s nothing new under the sun

Take Thomas Edison the inventor of the everyday light bulb as an example; many scientist of his day knew that a heated piece of carbon filament would produce a light.  However, the light would only last for a brief moment.

…So what did Edison do?

Did Edison come up with a new idea?  No; Edison improved upon an existing idea through creativity and concentration, by finding a carbon filament that would burn for over 1500 hours if enclosed in an oxygen free case.  It wasn’t a new idea, but his improvement on an existing idea made him great, while most people don’t even remember who invented the first electric light bulb.  It was Humphry Davy back in 1800, in case you were wondering.

William Faulkner said, “The artist is of no importance. Only what he creates is important, since there is nothing new to be said.”

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Is there an ‘essential key’ to personal development? One without which the ‘unlocking’ of your potential might be difficult if not impossible?

If we define personal development as growth involving the mind and the body, then ‘yes’ – I think there is.

Without this ‘key’ personal growth is slow, and sluggish. Without learning how to tap into this essential human ‘tool’, change will be sporadic or imposed from the outside.

And I believe the really important part is this: without developing this function of consciousness, all deep change will be difficult.

It does not matter what courses you buy, which ‘gurus’ you listen to, how many self-growth seminars you take. Because this is one thing you cannot do without.

The ability to self-observe, what some people call self-awareness.

Self-awareness meaning the ability to become aware of what is going on in:

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Though a positive, successful, and engaging person, Pam avoided prolonged looks into her mirror. When she was brushing her hair or applying make-up, she stayed focused on the activity – but would intentionally not make eye contact with herself. Except sometimes. On those occasions a tirade of negative judgments erupted in her thoughts.

If she didn’t avoid the negative assessment machine in her mind by distraction or busyness, the stream of thoughts that flooded into Pam’s awareness would chide her, “Your nose is too crooked. Your skin is a mess. You’re getting wrinkles under your eyes. You’re too fat. Nobody would give you a second look. You need surgery to look better.” In these moments, Pam would cringe and feel the familiar black pit in her stomach suck the positive energy right out of her. And she would begin to doubt herself and her ability to create a rewarding life.

The strange part of this internal conversation going on in her mind was that Pam knew there was no truth to the accusations. Pam has a dancer’s body and is a highly accomplished dancer. In addition, she teaches dance to serious students. She also is a sought-after model due to her beauty and flawless complexion. Over the course of time, she has attempted to debate the negative voice and has tried thought stopping, positive affirmations, and positive thinking. And for awhile these techniques worked – then, like a thief in the middle of the night, the character assassinations would creep back into her thoughts and cast seeds of doubt in her mind.

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Everyone knows sex sells. Greed sells too, and again, this is something we all know. But little did we know that the really big, best seller of all is FEAR and it’s companion, dread.

Here are some current ‘epidemic’, ‘impending’ ‘catastrophe-in-the-making’, brilliantly-marketed FEARS: Fear of recession, depression, terrorists, war, disease, food, air, climate change, computer crashes, natural disasters, breast size, impotency, break-ins, drug czars and addicts, immigrants and aging.

Here I focus on an area closest to my own experience as a physician-psychiatrist: the fear of illness and dying. As you read about overcoming and transcending this fear, think of it as an effective metaphor for the other fears listed above. When you come to the end reread the piece substituting each fear.

Start with this fact: To fear our body is a powerful way to create disease. Why is this? Because fear is about being attacked and when you think you are going to be attacked you are both hard-wired and soft-wired for flight or fight. This, in simple terms, is bad for your physical health when carried on continuously or repetitively on an intermittent basis. Your body is not set up to be constantly on the alert for danger or shocked repeatedly by the unexpected. It is not necessary to go into the physiology of why this might lead to high blood pressure, heart attack, stroke and even cancer. Here is the rub: If fear can be created it leads to disease thereby proving that the fear was warranted. This is every politician, salesman and businessman’s dream: to create a need for snake oil.

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Bob was a normal sort of guy. One day, he set the goal of making a million dollars. He took a job in sales because he figured that was the quickest way to get there. And, after a few years of hard and determined work, he did.

Bob’s a success, right? Bob’s the guy we all want to be – whether we’re in sales, or in a big company, or working for ourselves.

But – here’s the rest of Bob’s story.

During his time on the road, he barely saw his wife and kids. He missed them, sure, but he thought there’d be plenty of time for them after he’d got that money safely in the bank. Bob didn’t pay any attention to what he ate. He didn’t have time to exercise. He barely had time to eat.

He made that million, but in the process, he severely compromised his health – and lost his family.

Bob is not the guy we want to be.

Are you risking losing everything that really matters, in pursuit of your goals? What’s most important to you in your life? Here are a couple of big areas:

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I never thought it would be such a relief to be wrong but I’m starting to love it. Ahhhh!

Does that statement surprise you when there are so many success texts on how to be, or do things, ‘right’?

Good!

Do you know the pressure of feeling you have to be right? Do you know what it’s like to not be able to stand being wrong? It’s not pleasant!

Maybe YOU don’t but I bet you know someone like that. Someone who has to have the last word!

It might be funny for a few minutes but ultimately it’s annoying. And destructive.

Being unable to admit you are wrong is what I call a ‘psychological knot’. Creating greater openness and being welcome to ‘get it wrong’ can untie you for greater success!

A pastor I know said: “I’m scared of a man who can’t admit he’s wrong.”  Hitler, for example, was that man at one point. Even when everything was going wrong at the end of the Second World War, the films portray his lieutenants saying: “He hasn’t led us wrong before. We should trust him.” Yeah, that worked out. Confidence does not equal correctness!

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Many people go through life acting like trained circus animals.  They repeat the same antics they observed their neighbors, parents and family performing.  What they often don’t realize is that they are wrecking their lives.

Do you know someone that performs these tricks?

Understanding that these tricks change good lives into a zoo is the first step to freedom.  So, let’s take a look at the most common traps people fall into.

10 Very Common Stupid Tricks That Wreck A Good Life

I’d bet we’ve all witnessed at least some of these stupid tricks.  Unfortunately, they plague many people and are incredibly common.  Read over the list and let me know which one you think is the worst or most prevalent.

1.  Performing the starring role in a never-ending drama

It seems that some people want the days of their lives to mirror a soap opera.  They constantly behave badly and then wonder why their lives are so freaking crazy.  It is almost as if they are addicted to chaos!  These folks usually fail to see that they are their own worst enemy!  Do you know someone that is the big star in their own perpetual drama?

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Do you feel as though you’d accomplish so much more in your life if it wasn’t for all the obstacles in your way? Perhaps you’ve started on the journey towards numerous goals over the past few years … only to get knocked off course by all sorts of things.

If you’ve ever been on a diet, you might have faced obstacles like a vacation, Thanksgiving dinner, a box of chocolates, a busy or draining week…

If you’ve tried to write a book, your obstacles might have been social obligations, a lack of time or space to sit down and concentrate, no feedback or support…

If you’ve never managed to save up as much money as you’d like, you may have come up against obstacles like your car breaking down, invitations to pricy events, the irresistible impulse buy, or the expenses of Christmas…

Perhaps you feel as though you did your best. You had good intentions, you made plans – and then all sorts of things came up to derail these. Deep down, though, you know that people do succeed in dieting, writing books or saving up money … and that they sometimes hurdle seemingly insurmountable obstacles in order to do so.

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Every moment of every day is a new beginning for your life through the words you choose to use.

Words make up your thoughts and ideas. They shape the images in your mind, coloring what you perceive and believe.

In the world around you, words make up text messages, tweets, and on your Facebook page they explain your pictures, your past and your plans. They make up the laws that rule much of your experience.

Yet all this being true, we seldom stop to think about the ongoing power of the words we use and string together, the empowerment of words at our disposal when used effectively, or the power unleashed against us at our peril when words are used without awareness.

Our mind is the light we shine second by second on the words we choose from the infinite lexicon before us. It is critically important that we be alertly aware: The words we choose to shine the light of our mind on, shape our very life and its quality.

Now if we stop for a moment and think of the avalanche of words we are inundated with from without, never mind from the running dialogue within, it is easy to see the confusion this can lead to. Which words to choose and will they lead to an effective direction in our life?

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Right now, how many goals do you have? How many big projects and ventures are you involved with? Whether they’re related to your career, your family, your community activities or your personal life, have a quick think through them.

If you’re like most people, chances are you have too many goals – and you’re not going to see as much success as you’d like. In general, the fewer goals you have at any one time, the more likely you are to succeed in meeting them all.

Limit Your Goals – Don’t Limit Your Potential

Most of us have been through times when we’ve tried to do it all at once. Sometimes, this actually works: a health scare encourages us to turn our life around – everything from our eating habits to our career. (Jonathan Fields shares his story in Career Renegade about how a dramatic wake-up call from his heart got him to ditch his high-paying law career to start up a yoga studio.)

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